


This Isn't The End

by bisexuallaurel



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Canon Universe, Fix-It, M/M, S2E10 Fix It, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-07
Updated: 2017-03-07
Packaged: 2018-09-30 17:17:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10167908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bisexuallaurel/pseuds/bisexuallaurel
Summary: Fix-It fic for Shadowhunters s2e10.or, the one where Simon goes to talk to Jace after the events at the Institute and confessions happen.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so inexperienced with writing canon compliant fics so this is... semi canon compliant, I guess. At least it's set in canon. I hope it's alright lmao.
> 
> Contains spoilers for 2A of Shadowhunters!

Simon finds Jace a few hours later, curled up in a garden chair, deep inside the Institute greenhouse.

The dark grey cotton in his shirt seems to blend together with the shades of green surrounding him. The sleeves are a little bit too long and he’s tugged them down all the way so they’re falling over his knuckles.

He shifts a little and drops his head back, gazing up at the glass ceiling.

Simon approaches cautiously. Vampire speed and all, it’s easy to accidentally sneak up on people.

“Hey man,” he says from a few feet away, as if to soften the blow.

Jace jumps a little and turns his head towards the intruder. His shoulders relax when he sees that it’s just Simon. He nods as way of greeting.

Simon takes this as a green light to come closer. He takes a seat on the low bench next to Jace’s chair, and leans back on his palms.

“Long day, huh?” He says with a tentative smile.

Jace makes a face, but doesn’t say anything.

“Yeah, I guess I shouldn’t joke about it,” Simon says, glancing down at his jeans. He’s changed clothes since he was held captive by Valentine, but he can still feel the blood dripping down his shirt and seeping into his jeans. He shivers.

They’re all alone in here. The only sound breaking the silence is the rain smattering against the glass ceiling above them.

Simon glances at Jace, whose eyes are staring blindly at a nearby plant.

“Hey,” Simon says gently, nudging him with his knee. Jace turns to look at him. “Are you okay?”

Jace laughs hollowly. The sound makes Simon’s stomach churn. “I can’t remember the last time I was okay.”

Simon nods. “Yeah, it’s… it’s hard. I’m sorry.”

“Didn’t I tell you not to apologize?”

“Yeah, I guess you did. I thought that just extended to blood drinking, though.”

That earns him a tiny smile; just the briefest, gentlest little smile, but Simon will gladly take it.

“So,” Jace says. He brings his knees up to his chest and wraps his arms around himself. “What’s it like walking in sunlight again?”

Simon can’t help but break into a smile. He knows he shouldn’t; times are dire and Jace literally  (albeit accidentally and with good intentions) killed dozens of Downworlders mere hours ago, but this… He never thought he’d see the sun again. And yet here was, a few hours ago, dancing in the sunlight with his best friend. It’s something to smile about, right?

“It’s amazing,” he says softly. “It’s– man, I can’t describe it.”

Jace’s mood seems to lighten for a moment, and then the gloom settles over his features again.

“You do know it’s not your fault, right?” Simon says before he can help it. He recognizes that shadow lurking in Jace’s eyes.

Guilt.

Jace turns away his head and stares straight ahead. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“Yeah, I know,” Simon says with a nod. “But still. It’s not your fault. I know–”

“Simon, please,” Jace says, and his voice is strained. “There’s so much going on right now. I can’t–” He trails off, and closes his eyes. “I killed so many people. And Valentine…”

“That wasn't your fault. You were tricked."

Jace sighs, clearly not buying it.

"And Valentine is locked up,” Simon reminds him, but Jace just scoffs.

“We both know he’ll find a way out. It’s what he does. He manipulates and cheats and… I don’t know how to fight him. Apparently all I know how to do is fall for his tricks.” He runs a hand through his hair and leans further back into his chair. He stretches out his legs and crosses them.

“Not to sound like a broken record, but you do know that’s not true, right?” Simon asks. “Like… okay, yeah, things might be kind of messed up right now.” Jace shoots him a look and Simon amends, “Okay, _really_ messed up. But you always… you always try to do better. To _be_ better. That’s more than most people can say, right?” He smiles encouragingly.

Jace shrugs. “I guess.”

An impulse bubbles up inside of Simon and he allows it to flow through him and grip the mental steering wheel. With surprisingly little analyzation beforehand, he reaches out and puts a hand on Jace’s knee.

Jace jumps a little at the touch, but he doesn’t try to shake off Simon’s hand, so he lets it rest there.

“Seriously though,” Simon says, his voice a little quieter now. “If it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t even be here. Plus I almost killed you and you still don’t hate me. That has to mean you're a really good person. Man, you even have angel blood, right? You're literally an angel.”

“Who says I don’t hate you?” Jace says weakly. It’s like an automatic response, and it’s so much like their old banter that it makes Simon smile.

“Well, as much as you like to pretend you do, we both know you don’t,” Simon says. “For one, you literally saved my life.”

“Clary would never forgive me if I let her boyfriend die,” Jace says, and his tone has grown slightly colder. He looks away from Simon, his jaw clenched.

Simon slowly draws back his hand.

“About that,” he says, with an awkward cough. “We, uh. We broke up.”

Jace’s head snaps to the side. “What?”

Simon rubs the back of his neck. “Yeah.”

“I saw you guys kissing a few hours ago,” Jace says, his eyes wider than Simon has ever seen them.

“Mm, well,” Simon says, with a light chuckle. He tries not to linger on the thought of Jace having witnessed that unfortunate kiss. “I was so caught up with this ‘holy shit I can be in the sun again’ stuff that I forgot about it for a while. I mean, I love her and stuff, but not… not like that. I thought I did, but… yeah.” He trails off, dragging the tip of his shoe through the dust on the ground.

Jace nudges him with his knee. “You choose now of all times to stop talking?”

Simon laughs. “Well, I was talking to Maia about it and I realized it wasn’t Clary that I was in love with.”

He’s not sure if he imagines it or not, but he thinks he can see Jace’s face fall a little. He smiles, though, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. “Oh.”

“She doesn’t love me either, so,” Simon says with a shrug.

“Are you sure?”

Simon frowns. “I mean, yeah. We talked about it. She just sees me as a friend too.”

“Really? I thought you guys were gonna be the new Downworlder power couple.”

Simon’s mouth opens and closes. Downworlder power couple? Him and Clary? How could they–

“Oh!” he says suddenly, as realization hits him. “You’re talking about me and Maia?”

Jace looks at him like he’s grown two heads. “Yeah, what are you talking about?”

“Me and Clary!” Simon laughs, and it’s a real laugh this time. A little bit louder than it probably should be. “I’m not in love with Maia. That'd be hard since she’s a lesbian.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“Then who–”

Simon knows, from over 18 years of experience, that if he were alive right now, the tips of his ears along with his entire face would be turning a bright shade of pink. Instead he stays the same cold, pale self he’s been forced to grow accustomed to.

He doesn’t answer the unspoken question. Turns out, he doesn’t need to.

“When I saw you on that couch,” Jace whispers, his voice low and raw, “with blood everywhere… It felt like the whole world was ending. I didn’t know– I knew I needed to sell the performance and react like Clary would, like your girlfriend would, but I didn’t–” He sucks in a breath. “I didn’t have to pretend. I thought I was gonna lose you. I’ve never been that scared.”

Simon doesn’t know what to say. No words can compare to that declaration of… for a moment he wants to say love, but he knows it’s not true. What else can it be, though? Friendship?

But as he looks into Jace’s eyes that are glittering with unshed tears and what seems like an unlimited depth of affection, he can’t help but think that friends don’t look at each other like that.

He shivers.

“Jace…” he whispers hoarsely, glancing at the tongue dipping out to wet Jace’s dry lips. “I’m really bad at reading social cues but–”

“Fuck social cues,” Jace whispers back, his voice husky.

Not leaving any room for hesitation, he scoots closer so that he’s balancing on the edge of his chair, his hands on top of Simon’s knees to support his weight as he leans in.

The kiss is short and sweet, little else than a peck. But then Jace is leaning in and he keeps leaning until it feels like he’s about to fall into Simon, and Simon’s lips part around a gasp.

It’s so surreal, sitting here in the gloomy greenhouse and kissing Jace Lightwood of all people. Not that he hasn’t thought about it, because boy, has he. He’s thought about it more than is probably decent.

The real thing? Totally measures up to his fantasies.

Jace is softer than he anticipated, but it’s more of a bonus than anything else. Kissing Jace is like being bathed in sunlight, with warmth radiating throughout your entire body. Simon wonders what it would be like to kiss Jace outside, all soft touches to sunkissed skin and freckles. He imagines that Jace gets freckles in the summer.

Jace’s breath ghosts against his skin as they slowly pull apart. Jace’s lips look slightly pinker now, while Simon’s look fairly untouched.

He makes a sound in the back of his throat as Jace tentatively takes his hand. It feels more intimate than the kiss, somehow, but he doesn’t pull away.

“Wow,” he says, looking down at their joined hands. Is this really happening?

Jace smiles at him and squeezes his hand, as if to reassure him that yes, it is indeed happening.

Simon knows this isn’t the end of it. They need to talk, think things through, piece together how to fit whatever this is into their busy lives. Figure out whether this is anything at all.

But either way, he knows this isn’t the end. It’s only the beginning.


End file.
